Kikyou No Kokoro
by Yukishiro Madoka
Summary: Through my envy, I'll give you a smile and pretend I don't love you. I promise to love you forever, whether you love me or not...[sad poem] [KikxInu]


Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. 

A/N. Been in a bored/rather depressing mood lately, for some odd reason. O.o Just lacking interest in everything around me...I don't know why. Perhaps it's because of school? o.o;

Oh well. Anyways, this poem came to me when I was just lying in bed and thinking about how Kikyo feels about Inuyasha. And vuala! Out pops this...O.o

Anyway, it made me kinda sad to read this over. -shrugs- Don't mind me...xD Anyway, hope you likey! Drop a review if you can! -points to review button-

* * *

I was meant to be devoid of emotion.

I could not feel anything, it's true.

Being a solitude pained me so much.

That all ended when I met you.

-

It was love at first sight.

I think I dreamed you into life.

In your eyes, I see my future in an instant.

You, as my husband, and I, as your wife.

-

You were like me.

I was happy to know.

We wanted to ascend higher.

But we only went far below.

-

In your beautiful eyes.

I saw deep sorrow and pain.

I wanted to heal you.

Hoping my efforts weren't in vain.

-

Through all the times we shared.

My love for you grew.

You didn't feel the same.

Of course I knew.

-

In this what I call a life.

I hold nothing but desire to be loved.

By none other.

Than you, my beloved.

-

Your presence alone makes me happy.

Whether you stay long or awhile.

My heart throbs with love and warmth.

As you touch me with your smile.

-

You may think me a fool.

But my feelings are real.

I apologize.

But it's hard putting into words what I feel.

-

I never thought that love.

Could feel like this.

It's so beautiful.

Your warmth, your embrace, your kiss.

-

You may hate me.

And you may think I hate you too.

It's not easy saying this.

But I truly love you.

-

It pains me so much.

To know you'll never feel the same.

Because you love her.

I won't use her name.

-

I can't compete with her.

I'm not alive.

But she is.

If only I could be revived.

-

But I know even if I were alive.

It wouldn't be enough.

Thinking that you would love me.

Is only a mere bluff.

-

She has a beautiful soul.

Whereas I have no heart.

I know it wouldn't be fair.

If I were to tear you two apart.

-

She is perfect.

But I am not.

Perhaps it is best.

If I forgot.

-

But it is impossible.

I can't tell you goodbye.

Forgetting you would mean.

That a piece of me would die.

-

Your love is like a river.

Beautiful and deep.

But your love is now for her.

And you are not mine to keep.

-

I am never yours.

But you are always mine.

It hurts so much to know.

That our destinies aren't intertwined.

-

I'll admit I'm jealous of her.

But I will never hate.

I am not angered or outraged.

To know that she is your soul mate.

-

I'll admit I wish to be her.

To be in your embrace, your heart, and your stare.

To be loved above all others.

And to not fade into thin air.

-

We are rivals competing for your heart.

"She is my reincarnation!" I always thought.

To prevent the fierce battles.

We silently fought.

-

I am an envious fool.

That I will not deny.

And I shatter my envy

With every tear I wish to cry.

-

Just know I will always be here.

To watch you and your love grow.

I will try my best to be happy.

But I know I'll always feel deep sorrow.

-

I am selfish, it's true.

But I still can feel, I know I can.

I may be jealous and selfish.

But am I not human?

-

I can feel sadness.

I can feel bliss.

I can dream every night.

Of your tender kiss.

-

I can feel envy.

I can yearn for her to be replaced.

With myself in your arms.

And in your warm embrace.

-

I can feel bitter.

I can feel guilt.

Knowing how greatly

My selfishness has built.

-

I could not be human.

But you taught me that wasn't true.

Knowing this touches my heart.

And strengthens my love for you.

-

I want to be yours.

I want you to love me alone.

I want to be your princess.

And claim my throne.

-

I know this will never be.

I wish it were true.

But if my dreams could be reality.

I would be forever with you.

-

Just know I will always be here.

To watch over you two.

Through my envy, I'll give you a smile.

And pretend I don't love you.

-

You're beautiful.

It's true.

But I have to face the truth.

I will never be with you.

-

As much as I want you to love me.

I want you to forget.

Whereas I will always remember.

Especially the time we first met.

-

You may think I hate you.

But that isn't true.

Please know that I always have.

And always will love you.

-

Please forget me.

Please don't cry.

Please move on.

Please don't tell her goodbye.

-

All I ask is for your happiness.

That will please me a lot.

And I promise to love you forever.

Whether you love me or not.

-

Perhaps we were meant to be.

Perhaps our paths will cross once more.

Then you will be mine.

And I will be yours.

-

Perhaps I am tricking myself.

But I do not care.

All I can do is hope.

That God will answer my prayer.

-

Even though I am not with you now.

Even when I have died.

I promise that wherever you go.

I'll always be by your side.

-

Every night I pray.

To the heavens above.

That I will one day.

Be your beloved.


End file.
